Being a Kid Again!

This weekend I was lucky enough to watch my mom's cousin's two little girls aged 3 and 5. When people asked me their ages and I told them they gave me the eyebrows raised, are you crazy? look, but these are two of the best behaved little girls I've ever met and I really treasure whatever time I get with them. What's more is when I spend time with them I can be a kid again, playing in the park (trying out two different parks in one day!), bake cookies (though I guess I do this pretty regularly on my own :)), color, watch cartoons, sing songs (that they teach me), and tell bedtime stories (usually a recap of our day told by one or both of the girls). For me, it's an escape from my routine and a breath of fresh of air.

What I noticed this weekend more than anything was how easy it is for kids to live in the moment. At the park, the same slide provided endless entertainment - it was like they were trying it out for the first time, every time. At home, they completely immersed themselves in baking cookies and coloring, enjoying every minute of it. But I think what stood out the most was when we watched an animated Tinker Bell movie for the second time the next morning. As they were watching it a second time, the same parts that frightened them (cue fairy boat about to go down a waterfall) the night before were just as exciting the next day. Granted they're at a different stage developmentally than I am but it made me think about when I watch a movie for the second, third, or umpteenth time, I'm usually thinking ahead or reassuring myself of what happens next instead of just enjoying it like K and W did and do everyday.

I know I talk about living in the moment a lot, but I think it is a really important lesson and something I'm still working on and will always be working on. It was so refreshing to spend the weekend with the girls; they were a constant reminder to not only live in the moment, but also to enjoy it to the fullest every time even if it's the millionth time.

Being Present

I've talked a lot about being present, living the moment (to steal from David Romanelli's Livin' the Moment), to not dwell on the past, and to not worry about the future, but how in the heck do I do I actually do that? In many ways it's a lot easier said than done. And I'll be honest, I'm not perfect at it, but I'm trying everyday to be more present. And this is how I do it (or attempt to do it :)).

Let's take my upcoming move for example. Obviously, there are things I had to plan in advance - movers, packing, internet/cable, etc - so it's not like I could just leave things to take care of themselves. So, I did have to plan ahead but instead of overwhelming myself with every single task all at once, I made an effort to organize myself and my tasks so that I could do each one without worrying about the next because I knew there was a time and a place for each. In a way, I was present for each task. And if I find myself freaking out about all the things I have yet to do, I take a step back and focus on what I'm doing now. Maybe I ask myself if I could be using my time more wisely to remove some of the stress, or if I'm doing what I need to be doing, I focus on what I'm doing and reassure myself that everything will get done.

I guess I haven't moved yet so it's hard to use this example for dwelling in the past, however, I sometimes find myself anticipating my sadness. Even though I know this move is for the best, I sometimes struggle with letting go of the material things my current apartment has that my future apartment doesn't - stainless steel appliances, cherry cabinets, location to most buses and train stops (all silly, I know). So, when these thoughts start to appear, I make a conscious effort to change my train of thought. Maybe I focus on all of the good things my new apartment has to offer - windows with screens, more character, painted walls - or maybe it's just that I need to return my mind to the task at hand. I'm certain I'll still have these misgivings even after I move so I'll have to continue to re-focus my mind so as not to dwell in the past.

I guess for me, living the moment means making the best of a situation and letting go of the things over which we have no control (our pasts, for one). I think it's still important to learn from our mistakes and our experiences but it's more of a 'learn the lesson and move on' attitude than focusing all of your effort on re-hashing the past. And, of course, some things are much harder to let go of than others (material things are much, much different than losing a loved one). I know, for me, it took me over a year to let go of one piece of my past and there are still days I falter but no one's perfect and it's especially hard in the environment in which we live to be present so don't be so hard on yourself - if you're making the effort to be more present, then that's really all that matters.